​The Social Media Scaries

kasey corrado | social cues | oct. 2017

Ah, October. Football. Crockpots of chili. Apple picking. Pumpkin Spice Lattes. Pumpkin Spice everything. And of course, Halloween. I've always disliked Halloween — mostly because I get scared very easily. I don't do well with ghosts, ghouls, cobweb decorations, etc. I have to hum to myself when ads for haunted houses come on the radio and I still hesitate to go into basements by myself. One time at a sleepover I was peer-pressured into watching “The Ring" with about a dozen other 12-year-old girls and I still haven't fully recovered. For the record, I DO love the dressing up, candy-corn-all-month parts of the holiday though.

In the spirit of scary things, I thought I would share a few of the “scariest" (read: most embarrassing) things that I have seen or heard happen on social media.

1.Status bar does not equal search bar. I knew a guy in college who had enjoyed a few adult beverages and decided to hop on Facebook to look up a girl. The verdict is still out on whether or not he had a “thing" for said girl … but that's beside the point. Instead of looking her up in the search bar and finding her profile, he accidentally typed her name in his status bar and hit enter. Everyone's newsfeed suddenly saw exactly who he was thinking about at 3 a.m.! Yikes.

2.Oh, so your mom knows about me? There was a guy in college who had helped me with a project. I strictly thought we were friends. He was nice enough, but I didn't really think anything was going to happen between us. Well, one day I got a Facebook message from his mother telling me that she had mailed some homemade cookies to his school address and she wanted to make sure he shared some with his “crush" – wait, what? I had no idea how to respond. I felt so bad for everyone involved.

3.Deep in the trenches of Instagram. I pride myself on being a good social media investigator. Not too long ago, I was “creeping" on a new coworker to get a better idea of the person I would be working with soon. Instagram has this useful yet sometimes completely awful function where you only have to tap a photo twice to “like" it. I was years back in her feed and as I was scrolling I accidentally hit a photo twice. She got a notification that some random girl (me) liked her camping photo from 2013. I'm going to go crawl in a hole now.

4.Whoops, sorry. Wrong person. Best friends stick up for each other, right? Well, a friend of mine went off on some guy who was kind of being pretty cruel to both of us by sending him a very strongly worded Facebook message. The problem is that she wasn't friends with him on Facebook. She ended up messaging some guy by the same name (he had a pretty generic name, in her defense) that even looked kind of similar to the real guy. He messaged her back and said, “I'm really sorry you're going through this with this guy, but I've never met you. I think you have the wrong guy. I'm married and live in Wyoming." At least he wasn't a big jerk J

5.Thanks for the clarification. When I was in high school I had this weird habit of simply posting song lyrics as my Facebook status. For no good reason, I would just share lyrics of songs. It was a different time in 2007, ok? I discovered a rather fun, kind of upbeat rap song because I overheard my brother listening to it. I downloaded it on Limewire (how's that for a flashback?) and listened to it on repeat. There was one line in the song (I'm not going to say what it actually was) that I thought was particularly clever, so of course, I put it as my status. My mom also had Facebook (because my mom is awesome and was way before her time with joining social media) at the time and saw my status. She called my super sleek, red RAZR cellphone and said, “Uh, why do you have that as your status?" and I explained because I thought it was a funny line in a song. She goes, “Do you even know what that means?" and I said, “Uh, no? Does it mean something?" Well let me tell you, it did mean something completely different than what I thought. I was a bit naïve back then. Needless to say, I got rid of it very quickly. I'm a little better at checking the meanings behind phrases – and I also never post song lyrics as a basic status anymore either!


Kasey Corrado is a Social Media Director for Lawrence University by day and a member of Let Me Be Frank Productions by night. When she isn't updating Facebook or singing a 1970s classic, she enjoys running, cooking, questioning final rose picks on “The Bachelor" and planning overly extravagant trips to Disney.

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